The other day, while flipping through the channels, I stumbled across this clip from an old Beverly Hills, 90210 episode.  For some reason, I felt it was important to memorialize this travesty of cinema.  So, here it is, where it belongs…on YouTube:

November 1st, 2008.

It’s coming…

I forgot to mention this, but on October 14th, this website turned 4 years old.  Whoo…

I’m getting really fucking sick of hearing about these copper thefts that are getting so popular these days.  Petty theft and vandalism are bad enough as it is…but these scumbags take the fucking cake.  In case you somehow haven’t heard about these crimes, basically, you’ve got a bunch of druggies breaking into vacant homes, soccer fields, or anywhere else that might have a few thousand feet of wire.  Then, they destroy the entire fucking place in order to get the copper.  When the whole thing is said and done, the thieves have a couple hundred bucks worth of copper and the victims have $10,000 worth of damage.

These assholes all need to be shot in the head.

The other day, I looked over at our cat, Jack, to see that he was a bit more…yellow than usual.  For the life of me I couldn’t figure out what the hell had happened to him.  I was almost certain, because of the specific yellow shade, that he had somehow been peed on by our dog.

Eventually, though, I did figure out what happened to him.  Feel free to venture a guess in the comments section, before clicking this link for the answer.

I just took a shit and it smelled remarkably like Marijuana.

I died on October 7th, 2007.

At least that’s what my memorial website says.  I discovered memory-of.com last year and out of curiosity, started an account for myself.  I believe it started as an experiment in eulogizing myself, but in the end I couldn’t think of anything to say.  After that, I left my memorial, bare and forgotten.

Forgotten, at least, until the relentless e-mails began.  Death is big business after all and this website proves it.  Sign up for a simple page where loved ones can send their condolences and you’d better be prepared.  For months, I received offers to extend my page’s time on the Internet for a nominal fee.  Or, if that wasn’t permanent enough, I could pay to have the entire thing turned into a physical scrapbook.  They kept telling me that the memorial would be taken down soon, only to have last minute changes of heart.  “We’ve decided to leave up Brian’s memorial for another year at no charge!”

I had almost forgotten about my death again until a couple of weeks ago.  That’s when the “angelversary” e-mail’s began.  (Angelversary?  Really?)  There was one to remind me that the angelversary was coming and another a few days later to offer their sincere condolences.  A third e-mail expressed their hopes that the website had “been a comfort and a source of support” throughout the angelversary.  This last e-mail also took the opportunity to inform me, “Tomorrow is the last day that you can upgrade to a permanent Memorial Website at 25% off.”

We’ve only got a few things left to do really, but here’s a couple of pictures of the place in its nearly done state.  It’s already quite the upgrade from when we moved in.

…and has been for awhile.  On September 22nd, I watched Autumn pull the temporary stent out of her urethra.  It was…pretty interesting.  I doubt that Autumn will let me put the video online, but here’s a picture of the stent itself at least.

Remember to keep your kidneys healthy (and to donate to the National Kidney Foundation).